Daily Dose: 8/4/16 Tiger Woods’ career is waning, and Nike Golf is suffering

I played spades Wednesday night. I just need you to know that, because it’s the most fun card game on Earth. That is all.

When the headline reads “Family of Bears Enjoys Outing at California Lake,” then it leads. Let’s take this to its logical conclusion: A family of bears woke up in the morning, deciding that day, they were going to take a dip in the glorious waters of Tahoe, as you do. Mama Bear said, “Cubs, we’re going for a swim. Don’t forget your trunks.” Then, when they arrived they bathed graciously, unlike many of the rude humans around gawking and talking. Just kidding, this is quasi terrifying but also mega cute and why we shouldn’t encroach habitats, folks.

Ikea, for all its greatness, brings out the worst in people. The absolute worst. If you’ve ever been there with a significant other, never mind your parents, you know what I’m talking about. And because it’s all open plan and public, when you disagree with bae about which side table fits better in the guest room: everybody knows. My god, it’s awkward, but it’s part of the deal. You will watch people fight when you go to Ikea. VICE‘s Yasmin Jeffery asked a psychologist to break down what we’re looking at when we see these pre-Swedish meatball disagreements.

Have you ever seen the movie Minority Report? It’s a sci-fi “tech noir” movie about people who can see the future and thus predict crimes before they happen. Crazy, right? We wouldn’t want a society in which people were assumed to be committing crimes and thus throwing them in jail or killing them, as a result, would we? Oh wait, we have that. The next step to that is giving people longer sentences for one crime, based on another that they *might* commit. Check out FiveThirtyEight’s investigation into what Pennsylvania is trying to do next.

So, Tiger Woods just sunk Nike Golf. This is mind boggling. Back when he was at the height of his powers, every new school kid on the course was rocking whatever Eldrick had on. This was proverbial par. If he was the one that got you into the game, you were about this swoosh life. His influence was wide enough to hold up an entire golf equipment business. I’d like to think that Elin smashed that truck with a Nike 5-iron, too. Anyway, ESPN’s Darren Rovell reports that the Beaverton, Oregon, retail behemoth is now out of that business. Wow.

Free Food

Coffee Break: Old guy entry alert. Back in the day, I had a friend who was a subscriber to Nintendo Power. It was somehow better than him having an actual NES game system. It was the first magazine I remember genuinely being excited to read every time I saw it. And someone digitized an archive of it. Yessssssss.

Snack Time: The internet is telling me that Eminem has a beef with Drake over something said on a terrestrial radio station that may end up in a battle on Apple Music. Old guy rap sucks.

Dessert: This should be a fun show.

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